What you are worth is subjective. No hard feelings—it’s just how our primate brain works. We are drawn to people who are similar to us and tend to avoid those who are different.
The value of you and your skills is defined by the workplace you are in. If it’s a good fit, everything checks out—you do your best work and feel appreciated. If it’s a bad fit, things don’t work out well most of the time.
If you’re doing your best work and putting in the effort, but it still feels like it’s not enough, it might be time for a change. Value is a tricky concept to understand. What may be worth millions to you might not even be worth a penny to someone else.
We’ve been taught from the very beginning that if you have good skills and a strong skill set, everyone in the market will want to hire you. But that’s not true. That’s not how hiring works.
We are emotional, irrational beings. We believe we are rational, that we look at data and metrics to make decisions. But often, we rationalize everything—even the things we can’t explain, like decisions made purely from a gut feeling.
We love being around people who are similar to us. We become cranky and awkward when we encounter those with different worldviews. But being cranky won’t help you do the best work of your life.
We hire people who are similar to us—those who believe what we believe and agree with our worldview. It’s not about your worth or the value you provide. It’s about whether you and the organization you work for share the same mission. It’s about whether you and the organization agree on how the world, the team, and the product should work.
Skills are only a proxy for what you are capable of. But if people want to hire someone who’s a good fit, they’ll hire you for your “why”—why you do what you do. The “what” doesn’t matter as much. The “why” does. If it aligns with their mission, they will hire you even if they don’t know this is the reason.
When we agree on how the world should work or how a feature should function, we’ll naturally like each other. Even if we come from different backgrounds and don’t agree on everything, the shared mission will align us. There’s nothing more powerful than a group of people united by the same sense of purpose.
This is why you might be overvalued in one place and completely overlooked in another—and that can feel confusing.
Most of the time, when we’re not a good fit in a company, we feel miserable. You can put in all the hours, but no one recognizes your work. The hours spent building something great might feel like they’re worth nothing to others. It’s not about you doing something wrong or others having bad judgment.
People don’t care about you—they care about how you make them feel. If your work, in their opinion, helps move their beliefs and mission forward, you will be cherished. And to consistently achieve that, you need to work with people who share your beliefs and mission. This way, you’ll be doing work you already care about, while also benefiting the group. That group will value and cherish you, making you invaluable to them.
Don’t get disheartened or demotivated if you’re not a good fit. If you have great skills, it’s often not about how good you are but whether you’re in the right place.
Focus on finding the right fit. As an employer, look for employees who align with your mission. As an employee, find a workplace that agrees with the way you work. It’s not easy, but it’s worth the effort.
When you find the right fit, you’ll be happier than ever.